there are many reasons why I like China and love my travel here, but there are also a few reasons why I could never make it permanent! I don't think I'd survive living and working in Asia (or more specifically China, excluding HK and Guangdong where they speak Cantonese and my Mandarin is useless, oh and Shanghai because they speak Shanghaiese, and almost every other part because they all speak bloody dialects! Hmmph).
I don't think I could live here for more than 6 months without:
a) REAL bread.
Not sweet-stick-to-the-roof-of-your-mouth-soggy-consistency bread. Bleh. I am CRAVING a grilled cheese sandwich. And no, I am not pregnant.
b) Committing homicide on a regular basis
Flippin' Heck, people here really get on my last nerve. Yes, it's a different culture, and I need to adjust. BUT, when I'm getting on a tram - one foot on the bottom stair, hand on the rail, lifting myself into the door - and someone tries to get on it ahead of me by literally contorting themselves inbetween my foot and raised arm... can you really blame me if I get a little testy? I am learning to truly appreciate what elbows are for. And I've finally figured out that respect for elders is overrated when said elders are trying to scam-push-rip-off-cheat you at every turn. The one-armed shove is becoming my new forte.
c) Feeling like an animal in captivity, an attraction, a freak.
I've lost count of the number of photos I've been in - voluntarily or not! People keep asking me to be in a photo with them, or they take them stealthily while they think I'm not looking. Like I don't notice! Hmmm, maybe I should just charge?!
d) I'd have to be N.A.K.E.D. here for the entire time.
Even I am freakishly tall here and no way does any place sell ANYTHING to fit me without me looking like a spandexed sausage. Lovely.
I aim to spend a month in an intensive Chinese course so I can at least learn to cuss people out and tell taxi drivers to take me where I want to go! THAT particular skill would indeed come in handy! Right now the best insult I am able to offer a taxi driver in Hong Kong that takes me the long (read twice as expensive) way round is "you have no honour". Not exactly biting, is it? :/
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